How Because It Will

This poem was written by a friend that’s part of a group I meet with

“Poets or theologians or saints or warriors all,
Or lovers or astronomers. Like honey-drops the speech
Distilled in apophthegms or verses from the lips of each,
On roses and predestination and heroic wars
And rhetoric, and the brevity of the life of man, and the stars.”

Anyway I liked the poem a lot, and asked him if I could post it on my blog. He said it was OK but he wanted it to be anonymous. I suppose if you know me well you might be able to put a name on it from these hints, but that’s all you’ll get in this post.


How do we want it to end
Because it will
These kinds of things don't last forever
So
By accident or choice
How will it come about
That our histories will henceforth
Be told in separate chapters
Separate books
Kept handy upon the nightstand
Or gathering dust on a forgotten shelf


Either due to a consequence
Of choice or conflict
Eventually we will move
In relation to a fixed point
The choice to move toward 
Does not require looking back
But, always looking back
Is to not see where one is going
Memories of an angry voice
Or disappointments
Are heliocentric suns
From which we can't look away
Around which we blindly move


By emotional reaction 
Or free will
Either things will get stretched
And stretched
Until the tension is too much
A violent snap shooting us off
In opposite directions
Or we will be standing at a door
That one of us must close
Gently, intentionally
And be allowed to close
And from which
We must both depart


By consequence of reaching forward
Or consequence of past conflict
Either way we choose
But what will we tell ourselves?


How should it go
When it goes
When we go
When one goes
Either as one slipping silently away
Around a corner 
And into obscurity
From cause to destination unknown
A speechless retreat
Designed to create 
A cloud of unknowing
A fog of unanswerable inquiry
Or as one gently closing a door
As one both leaving
And accepting one's own leaving
And one allowing the leaving
In acceptance of an era ended
Of joined timelines split
Taking separate trajectories


How should it end
With the end in mind
Let's banish all stories
No tall tales 
In which I am the hero of mine
And you of yours
And whereby all's explained
And thereby all's set right
From one point of view
And no dilemmas too
No horns on which contradicting
Choices or values
Pin us down
No lesser of two evils


No predeterminations
No predestinations
No accidental events
After all, it's just been us
All along, and what we do


How do "I" want it to end
With the end in mind
In sight
What does my dignity require
That someday I will close the door
(Unless you've closed it first
Or have vanished with it still ajar)
I will close the door 
While wishing you good luck
I will close it gently 
With you in my eyes
Until the final sliver disappears
And the latch clicks
And then I'll turn toward 
Whatever future I've heard calling
And to which I'm moving 
Forward


November 2017